Eve before Christmas Eve 2021

 

Well, well.  Church this morning did not happen :(...

Insomnia till about 6 AM sure did.

As I was in the midst of it, the insomnia 

and then realized there was no way

I could make liturgy locally,

I soon began to see that I had to do less and breath more.

DV we go to our far-away church tomorrow AM for liturgy, 

PM for vigil and again Thursday AM

for our Christmas liturgy.

(For those who may not know, liturgy means the church service

where Holy Communion is offered.)

So I rested till about 10 AM and took it easy

(while getting stuff ready for Christmas)

and I even had a peaceful rest time.

***

This Christmas is so different.

Dec 25 Christmas I was just super busy trying to make a nice

Christmas day for our friend; it was nice; I felt a lot of joy; 

this January Christmas is really 'it' for me.

But it is strange.  People we love won't be there at liturgy

because of changes that happened because of the pandemic.

Actually it's in the news, 

NJ tops the list of states people fled during the pandemic.

NYC too.  Huge hits there. 

***

I am seeing the huge surge in the virus in England right now.

58,784 new cases on Monday :(

So England, you are in my heart and prayers, such as they are...

It's already in the US, the newer more contagious strain.

I am deeply aware, now, that we may be in for a difficult Spring.

NJ is actually, considering everything, doing pretty well right now.

And vaccine stuff is racing now to get it underway.

I told Mr Husband today that I feel like we are just scraping by,

having Christmas this week; like just getting inside at the last moment.

***

We are making plans to get takeout after Christmas liturgy

and eat outside with a few friends social distanced like.

***

We are being as careful as we can be, I can assure you.

***

After my Husband went to bed, I mopped the kitchen, 

hallway and living/dining room.

I have the Christmas towels (thrift store finds!) out, 

our table is set

for Christmas feasting, 

and we have plans for the rest of the week

that do not involve me cooking.

***

I lit the candles esp tonight just to celebrate that we made it this far.

We had fia sauce with noodles and (canned, drained) clams added after

the Pasta was heated up (it's leftovers, glorious leftovers!)

***

Next week I plan on, DV, roasting a chicken, making cherry and pecan yeast bread,

resting, reading Christmas things (and cookbooks) and plain resting.

***

It was hard to miss today's liturgy. 

I hunger for it more than ever. Esp knowing that this pandemic,

it's not over yet....

***

I feel like I suddenly realized how Christmas busy and poor sleeps lead to 

a greater struggle for me with anxiety and troubled thoughts.

Silly, I have learned this lesson before

(too busy = too stressed = exhaustion = anxiety and even despair)...

But it's like a gift that I was suddenly seeing this more clearly 

and thought that this may help one of you out so I am sharing it. 

***

When it is possible, rest is so vital and I forget that I need to make space for it.

***

It was esp tough this year as 

I was not able to do any baking in earlier months 

like I often do.  

Well.  I feel so blessed to know that we have a good pantry and if things get

difficult with the pandemic again, we are more prepared than before.

And I know that this is a HUGE blessing. 

***

Today would have been my +Aunt Karen's 70th birthday...

and tomorrow is my +Grandpa John's birthday, he passed away in 2006 

if I remember correctly... 

Memory eternal to dear dear beloved ones!

***

May God protect us and hold us in His heart.

May God comfort us, lead, guide us and save us!