Sunday, September 23, 2007

Wow. the Weeks fly by

And again I do not write that consistently.

what to say? i have a sinus cold. i love my church. i love the Orthodox church. i made my spiritual father laugh last night when i asked him to "bless my head" as i could not kiss his hand and receive his blessing. (i was not about to risk giving him my cold any more than i did by talking with him).

life is full of ups and downs; at times devastation and at times a sense of joy; i seek to be in the centre of God's will and ask His mercy.

there is really not much else to say, currently... other than to affirm the need to say "Glory to God for all things."

Saturday, September 08, 2007

Madeleine L' Engle - Memory Eternal

Just found out she has passed on.

Comforted to realize that, last night, as i looked at my icons, and at the books i have, including her last book of poems, i prayed for her.

This from the NY Times:

I have expected this news for a few year; we must pray for her now.

She knew what it was to love and to give love; when I heard her speak when I was 19 the love I felt coming from her was tangible; like a spiritual grandmother.

She helped me believe in miracles and was part of my path into the Orthodox church.

Memory Eternal, may all pain be washed away...

Thursday, September 06, 2007

I do not think I have been tagged before

Well. How ‘bout that; Mimi gave me a Nice Matters Award; go to to see; it is lovely and pink!

It will take me a while to nominate 7 others, as like Mimi all the blogs I read I find to be Nice People. That Mimi gave me this award corresponds with what I have seen of her blogosphere character – always giving a kind comment, no matter if my day is going well or not so well. Thank you again Mimi.

I do not own a digital camera as of yet but someday I hope to have a picture of Cleo up so people can see the cute cat that is currently sitting on my 1970’s gold armchair, sleeping. She is sprawled out on the top of the chair-all quiet like-as one may say. Cleo is a non-pure breed Himalayan-so blond with the hints of a light brown, black feet, ears and nose and lovely pale blue eyes. She is such a pretty cat, I am still amazed I have her.

Tonight I had a purposely quiet night; I had been busy day and night for nearly a week and was getting quite frazzled; I have both introvert and extravert tendencies, though I am learning more about how to honour my introvert side, by being quiet more often. To this end I often do not have any music playing. After months of quiet I realize that a lot of today’s music, even my beloved Amy Grant who I listened to as a kid, upsets me internally. It is hard to explain, but now I wonder how many other people are living a frantic life and are constantly being bombarded by jarring sounds, sounds that most people accept as normal, part of everyday North American life.

It is wonderful, to not have much sound going. For me it means the songs of vespers and liturgy are often playing in my head. It is incredible how we have a memory for sound; when I lived in Sweden ten years ago at a Bible school, no music was aloud other than with headphones (which is another thing I find to be a social problem of today, but that is another topic). I vividly remember feeling slowly purged of sound and that songs I had not heard in years were surfacing, playing in my mind. I really think this was one of the steps towards the wholeness that I trust God will grant me a little each year, if I keep cooperating.

Back to tonight – I finally had my much-craved Dutch meal (or what I associate as being a Dutch meal). Mashed potatoes with milk and butter, boiled vegetables, and a slice of meatloaf (with mush room soup as the gravy); add some tea, a very small glass of red wine and two small milk chocolate pieces for dessert. It was heavenly. And I ate it using my nicer silverware, blue and white china and a nice white place mat.

I have washed up my dishes, read more of a new English mystery called Jigsaw and feel rested. Thank God for a quiet evening and that He gives the true silence that we all long for.

Saturday, September 01, 2007

four years ago, two years ago

four years ago i went to liturgy at St. Herman's for the second time and went to the picnic at Kurt (now Dn Kurt) and Victoria's house, with Phil and Shannon. That began it all and by early October, when i went home for my sister's wedding, i was full of stories about this new church i was going to...

two years ago i came the first time to Ottawa and asked the priest there if i should come to confession. and so i came, after vespers, and soon realized that i had met my spiritual father. and i love my church and the routine and that today, on this lovely two year anniversary, i could go to vespers again...

i thank God for St. Herman's for bring me to the church and that four years later i am still here, in the Orthodox church that is now my home.