I was worrying about something today,
feeling all heavy and unable to shake it,
read two fun books (here and here),
talked to an old friend on the phone
(that alone was a victory, sometimes when I get stuck in worry,
I have a hard time reaching out) and that conversation as such a blessing.
And then I went and did an errand, still waiting to get some
news about the thing I was worrying about.
And when I finally did, I found I was still a bit stuck.
And so I talked to my Mom and well, she and I are quite different;
she does not struggle like I have for years with anxiety; just different people,
different Crosses; anyway she said something that helped me re-focus and
settle in a more peaceful way.
***
Basically, she advised me to accept what today is.
Accept that today, this and this is what is happening;
accept it, love those in your life, be supportive,
even if you don't understand or don't know what it means long term;
it's one of those unbloggable hard places where the only clear direction
is to take the very next step and see what that step means and
then in time, another step, another waiting and so on.
In another way, it was encouragement that I have been counseled on in
various ways for years:
be with God today.
Be IN today.
Not obsessing about a past one wishes
was different in ways or thinking of a future that one
does not know and can't control.
See the good in today. BE in today.
LOVE today. Create that warm loving home that my Husband
can find comfort in. Light the candles.
Take the warm hot bath with other candles.
Listen to beautiful classical music.
Pray together. Read Scripture. Read your Psalter.
Accept the day for what it is and be at peace,
knowing that God sees the next steps,
the ones that I wish to see; the ones that I wonder about.
I still have a long way to go on this.
I have never been good with waiting or with what seems,
at least momentary, like a perplexing unknown.
And seek to be thankful, to not despair, to HOPE.
And that is all I need for what feels like a severe mercy of
Monday's Wisdom.
8 comments:
Your mum sounds like my daughter,practical and down to earth. My daughter has had her challenges but is calm and tackles problems consistently, but let's go of what is beyond her control.
Me on the other hand.... Anxious,impatient,distressed. Talk about role reversal !! But we compliment each other as I am more inclined to tackle problems aggressively,seeking solutions.
We are all different, but God is steadfast.
Be of good heart,
Ann Marie
BE in today. LOVE today... That's where we should be isn't it, in the moment, and thankful, no matter what. Such good, wise advice from your Mom. So glad you share it with us. Like you, I can sometimes have a hard time with anxiety. Even with prayer, I sometimes still struggle. I try to remind myself of Scripture "let not thy heart be troubled..." May your heart not be troubled, my friend, and your burden light. :) ((BIG HUGS))
Your Mom is SO wise! Hugs and prayers xxx
You've reminded me of my own mother, who was a great "what-iffer." She constantly was imagined tragedies and horrors, saying, "But what if...?" One day I said to her, "What if you stopped worrying?" She gave me a perfectly expressionless stare for a moment, and then said, "But what would I do with my time?" I still laugh, every time I remember it.
I should worry more than I do, I suppose, but I've never found it particularly productive. I try and save my energies for other things. I hope your various "hards" do ease, so that anxieties can fade away!
Hi Elizabeth, it's nice to read your post today. I too spoke to my mother today. We do not have a very good relationship, which makes me sad, but it is what it is, and I've learned to embrace the good parts when I can. I have lots of anxiety too. My mother has a lot of problems, but generally she is pretty upbeat about her life, which is more than I can say for myself most of the time and I don't even have very many problems, so it's something to work on. I like what your mother said to you, I think she sounds like a very wise lady.
Thank you everyone!!! Such kind comments! and wonderful stories and words!
Jennifer Hays ~ nothing is perfect; it's hard to realize that this includes our parents.... I am really sorry for your anxiety; I know how hard it is; been thinking of your situation... Yes, my Mother has a lot of wisdom to offer me, I am really grateful. It's partly because she is more into having a 'simple faith' as she calls it; it can sure see through a lot of brush and find day light again.
My spiritual father is always reminding me that we are saved *today*. Not yesterday, not tomorrow. I have a very, very hard time living peacefully in the present. I am always worrying about the future, trying to play the chess game six moves in advance.
Your mother is right. :)
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