I was happy to see the remaining colours of red and gold;
defiant leftovers from the holiday season.
What else do we do during this time?
I drank my fish oil and took my morning vitamins.
Worked on cover letters.
This is a huge struggle this week - each job I am applying to has
emotional implications for me
that I can't go into but only allude to.
The snow and grey is here,
but there is red and gold remaining...
I visited my favourite tree.
I do love my trees.
It really spoke of mid-winter grey
to see my tree without sun or leaves.
But it's beautiful strong trunk and beautiful twisting limbs
were there to greet me as usual.
I may get a temporary contract doing data entry.
It would pay the bills and keep me going
till April or so.
I think I was not selected for a second interview with
the out of province job.
I was kind of bummed about this but not fully;
the idea of moving and starting this job
was really overwhelming.
I am reminded of a story in the book on Elder Thaddeus
in which a woman comes to him
barely able to walk and supported by two friends.
He speaks with her and tells her she is too depressed;
that her husband will come back,
that she must SING...
sing to her husband, SING...
and he promises to go to church to do some prayers for her
and she looks at him
and he at her
and he tells her go home...
and soon the woman who had come barely walking
begins to RUN and runs back,
How this struck a cord with me;
We must SING. We must FIGHT. We must ask God for His help
and remind ourselves that
God is with us
that we are never abandoned.
And we must see every day the goodness of God
and the beauty He puts forth...