Friday, October 09, 2009

Not Sure

Like the Squirrel? I talked to it while I took this picture.

Made me think of MamaJuliana who recently took a

similar picture.

So I realized this morning that I am not sure about the possible

part time job.

If I take it, it will give me enough money to live on

but not much to pay school loans on.

It will last until March.

Here's my concern:

If I take this job I will learn French part time and have less time to really devote to it.

At the end job the job, I will have more work experience,

a possible foot in a door for work,

and more on my resume.

BUT: my real desire was to learn French so that I would not be stuck in the position of

taking the slender pickings of English-only jobs

instead of having a chance at many more jobs in Ottawa that are bilingual.

And I am worried that I will be stuck in a cycle of catch when catch can

of job -agency jobs, which even many of these are bilingual.

(My sister took this picture, it reminds her of God).

I do not know if God will show me outright what to do,

but if peace internally is part of an indication,

I am not fully at peace about this possibility.

However it is hard to discern what to think.

Am I not at peace because of the unexpectedness of it

or because it is not the right way to go?

I pray that God will give me wisdom

if the job is offered to me.

Thank God that the real answers are already here.

I must look to the Christ-child born to us to die to save us.
Thank you so much for all your prayers for me -
I sure did not know when I was younger that life would be so unclear!
Yet the Lord is good to us and in this and in Him I must rejoice.


Mimi said...

I know the right decision will become clear.

And, I'm with your sister, the sun shining through clouds like that always makes me think of God too.

elizabeth said...

thanks Mimi! I appreciate you!

Elizabeth @ The Garden Window said...

Difficult decision indeed. Prayers that things will become clearer for you very quickly.........

margaret said...

I will pray. I don't have any discernment myself, I'm always struggling to hear my angel's voice above all the conflicting rationalities of life. I have done a lot of temp work though and I know it can be a hamster wheel that is hard to get off into something better so you are right to be concerned about a cycle of agency jobs. I guess a lot depends on how long your social security will last and what you have to fall back on when things get really dire *hug*

November In My Soul said...

You are doing all the right things and the answers will come when you need them. I struggle with similar issues all the time and have learned to listen, to wait, to practice faith. I enjoy your blog as it often reminds me that I am not alone in my struggles, that my life is the rule and not the exception. And I really enjoy your photos, you have a good eye.

elizabeth said...

thanks so much Elizabeth, and also for your prayers and understanding M and Nov, thanks. you and your father in law are in my prayers.

yes, truly we are not alone.

thegeekywife said...

nice photo. Reminds me that even among all the clouds the true Light shines down.

St Xenia of Petersburg, intercede for Elizabeth, that she may receive discernment.