Friday, June 29, 2012

Good Ol' Ottawa

 
Saw this sign on walk home from work.
Too funny
but a little sad too.
*
Said goodbye today to the last long time
library employee.
It is the end of an era and I felt it.
*
Did some errands.
Talked to a good friend.
Talked to my Orthoman.
I have lots to do.
The first night back in Ottawa
I had a troubled dream about moving
suddenly and wanting to go back to my apartment
for treasures I was worried that I left there.
*
The long time library employee and I talked about
grieving the loss but
also seeing what there is to be gained
in what comes next.
*
There is loss in this transition in my life
but also gain.
New life, new ways to serve, people to love.
*
Another library colleague told me I am half
in my new location already.
This is true.
Ottawa is already becoming a place I am leaving
and not a place I am living or
preparing to stay and live in;
I am slowly letting go.
*
It is not easy
but it is good and right.

4 comments:

Sarah in Indiana said...

I'm really struck by your thoughtful examination of your feelings about the transition you're going through. I know I didn't think about it that much before I was married. I was excited and stressed out, but I just focused on the things that had to be done, and didn't really examine my feelings. I'm not sure if that made it harder or easier.

elizabeth said...

Hi Sarah,

thanks for your comment! I think writing helps me process :)

I think everyone processes things differently...

:)

blessings to you...

Sarah in Indiana said...

Definitely people do process differently--it strikes me that one of the reasons I didn't think so much about the stress of what I was going through was that I was 10 years younger than you. At 25, the previous 3-4 years of my life had been transitional and filled with moving, new jobs, new people, etc. Maybe it seemed normal to me then! You are having a much more dramatic change leaving a city you've lived in for a long time.

elizabeth said...

Hi Sarah,

Yes, I think being at 35 instead of 25 is a real difference in how things are processed, etc. I don't know that I would of understood what I am going through as much as I do if I was 25... and being in Ottawa for 7 years is a difference... I am grateful that I have the chance to marry and move however... God is our Rock, our unchanging anchor in a sea of change...

thanks again for writing!