Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Truth

One of my good friends told me
that about the French test
that I want the truth.
*

I need to know what doors are open to me
and what doors are not.
*
Well,
as I suspected from doing the practice tests,
I did not get the level needed for the French test.
I did not pass it,
in other words.
*
It was a hard test
and
even harder on the computer.
I did better when I was doing the written tests
on paper.
Well.
I thank God that this is over;
I am really exhausted from the test!
*
Thanks for your prayers.
*
I need help and wisdom as I will,
most likely,
NOT get this job
(as I explained before French can really
keep you from jobs here;
if you think I still have a chance at the job
to be honest I would rather
you not say so
as I don't have the energy to explain again what
living in Ottawa the Capital of Canada
that is an officially bilingual country
means for job chances).
*
In other words,
I am a bit bummed and don't
want to be offered false hope,
however loving and very well meaning it is.
*
But may the Lord's will be done.
*
May God be praised.
*
May the Lord provide me the wisdom I need
to know what to do as I need a job;
May the right door open
for me.
*
May I say in my semi-weary state,
Glory to God for All Things.
*
And, I hope my request for no-false hope
NOT be translated as a lack of thankfulness
for all the love encouragement and support I have been given.
No much on the contrary,
you all mean TONS to me;
it's just that I don't want my heart to break.

12 comments:

Pres. Kathy said...

I am sorry that you are going through these feelings. May God's Will be done. Just remember - when one door closes, another opens. Don't be upset - what matters is that you did the best you could. God has another plan. I will continue to pray and you will see that everything will fall into place. Sending you lots of hugs!

GretchenJoanna said...

You have shown courage and diligence thus far, in all your studies and prayers; it is up to God to order your steps and make your efforts bear fruit with His grace. He will. You'll probably need a little rest at this point while you figure out what direction to go next. I'll keep praying for you, too!

thegeekywife said...

prayers for peace and mercy. GJ said it better than I can! <3

TeresaAngelina said...

Ah, Elizabeth, I am sorry for this but am not surprised. French from scratch as you have been attempting and then hoping to obtain a professional position is unless you are very good at languages, not possible. And you are quite right; this will not do. However, your courage and determination is to be commended! And from this courage, which is from God, you can transfer to the next adventure that will be given to you. Christ is in our midst! (And because He is...you know the rest...)

TeresaAngelina said...

By the way, this is not to discourage you from continuing in your studies; I hope you do continue. You put so much effort into it, and with continued effort (though maybe not at such a break neck speed...easier that way...)you will succeed but perhaps not in time to obtain the position you want. Does not mean that your efforts are wasted - just means you may find that there are other opportunities you had not seen before.

elizabeth said...

Thanks Pres. Kathy; yeah; it was disappointing but at the same time a relief just to know the outcome!

Thanks so much GJ - I really appreciate your words.

Thanks GW! I need the prayers, as we all do :)

Thanks TA - no worries - yes it is really hard to assimilate a new language in about 6 months. and I do hope I will get to continue and am hoping that there are opportunities that I have yet to see!

Amy the Lion said...

Elizabeth,
I'm sorry that the truth is not what you were hoping for, and I hope that you continue to have the courage and the patience to find the alternative path. Know that there are many walking this path with you, and that there are many others searching in their lives for meaningful work that will make use of their gifts and give glory to God. My thoughts are with you!

GretchenJoanna said...

Elizabeth, forgive me for using this space to connect with someone else, but I saw Amy the Lion's new blog, after she commented here, and I signed up to follow, and I want her to know why and from where I come, but as has been the case with many blogs, I can't comment yet, until and if she changes her comments format to "pop-up." So Amy, if you are reading this, it's me! Thank you, Elizabeth. :-)

elizabeth said...

Thanks Amy!!

and No problem GJ! :)

mamajuliana said...

I will keep you in my prayers. I am sorry that you did not do well, but as others have said you have tried your best.

God will you all that you have gone through to order your steps in the future!

Elizabeth @ The Garden Window said...

I am so very sorry you did not get the result you were hoping for !

You have woked very hard and have achieved a great deal in a short space of time, but learning a language to any degree of fluency is almost always a lengthy and difficult process as an adult.

Something will turn up for you in God's good time. Continuing my prayers for you !

Matushka Anna said...

I will echo others and remind you that you clearly did your best. God rewards our efforts, just not necessarily in the way we may have envisioned it at the time. I've experience this so many times, but I could only see it looking backwards - sometimes from the vantage point of several years! Sending you (((hugs))).