Icon Light

I love St. John of Kronstadt.

I got this icon over Christmas and New Years holidays when

I was at the monastery.

My lampada, at my old apartment,

was lit in front of a paper copy

of this icon.

When I got the icon of Rublev's Trinity,

the lampada became the light for the icon of the Holy Trinity.

Finally, this past weekend, I had time to put up my small shelf

and now have a light by St. John of Kronstadt again.

When ever I enter this room, I am deeply encouraged to see

the bright light by St. John.

Glory to God!

Still Can't Believe It

You know, as time goes on, I am beginning to see.

If I had been just a little bit farther out, I would of been hit full-body by the car. My foot from just above the heel up to the big toe on the other side of my foot was run over. This may of saved my life.

My spiritual father said Angels were pushing cars away - I fell in the middle of a busy intersection.

I could of died and instead I am alive.

I am in awe and yet can scarcely take it in.

I was at church with a broken foot, instead of being in hospital, or dying or, God so grant His mercy, in heaven.

I am happy to be alive and I pray that God will help me do His will and struggle to be obedient to Him - how hard this is, but how much I need it.

Lord have mercy on me a sinner.

Quietness and God's provision

Today was my first day off. I slept in. Had tea. Talked on the phone. Ran errands, and had tea with a former classmate from Library School... who I ran into at the Library. I am enjoying a quiet apartment.

So, I have a job. I will be running a small library in a corporate setting. All by myself, with help from other associate libraries, esp. one of them. I am starting reading on this tomorrow. I have never done this type of work before and have MUCH to learn. I am thankful.

The good things about my DV new job:

*it is 4 days a week
*I have benefits
*it is a permanent job
*I can learn a lot professionally
*I can walk to work - no more buses!

The challenging things:

*less money (4 not 5 days a week of work/pay) but still enough (student loans will take longer to pay off but that is okay)
*new responsibility and lots of learning
*faster paced environment

I felt a bit overwhelmed this weekend, but had a lot of good conversations with people and am trying to stay peaceful and not worry.

I tend to worry about the unknown.

THANK YOU everyone who prayed for me. I did the salary negotiations on my last day of work at my former job. Incredible timing.

I now have 2 weeks off before starting my new job. I get to go shopping, study up for my new job, read books, cook and do errands.

God has been so good to me.

The pull towards Holy Week amidst Cover Letters

We are almost in the 5th and last week of Lent!!! I think a lot of us feel a bit battered by now. The marathon to Holy Week is always challenging, often in unexpected or unforeseen ways. But straggling and bedraggled, we are coming.

I am working on a cover letter again. I am slowly getting a format down so that I can use again, with changes according to job description.

It is such a challenge to look for work! It takes a lot of perseverance and spiritual battles against apathy and despair. Perfect for Lent!!

I am starting the feel the pull towards Holy Week; the prayers of Bridegroom Matins are coming back; the freedom, intensity and otherness of this week. I can't wait. My spiritual father has said if one could only live 7 days, these are the 7 days to live.

I have taken the whole week off. Works well since I need to use up my vacation time; to me this was not even something I thought about not doing. I am an Orthodox convert - isn't that just something we would do? :)

It is also practical - Pasca flu can really happen. The services can be intense, long and deeply beautiful. I could go on...

But I better finish the draft of my cover letter so I can go to vespers on time...