(Days 33, 34 & 35) without Cleo: there and back again ~ a lovely Tolkien adventure!

My Husband and I drove, after liturgy on Friday,

with lunch and a grocery store run,

to Emmaus PA where we went to the lovely

Doxamoot: The Orthodox Christian Tolkien Conference

I loved seeing my Husband so happy talking with various 

people about books, authors, Tolkien included of course,

poetry, movies, Japan to England, all was discussed :)

***

A gift and a surprise for me was that a deacon from my church in 

Ottawa was there with his daughter and wife!

We had some really uplifting conversations and it really was 

a gift for me... 

***

I saw this cute meme (below) today and I found

that my God-given gift of fellowship with ones who know

so many I love in Ottawa was in line with it! 

Today is a rest day for me!

While we were so happy that we got home

(we stayed for liturgy, Fr Andrew's serving felt very 'Tolkien' to me,

of course it can easily be said that he is very Viking in stature

so not a big surprise :) it was very nice! ) ...

***

I met a lovely lady there named Lily who I failed to get contact info for -

but I had mentioned my blog to her.  So if you are reading this Lily,

I would love to stay in touch, 

you can write me at my blog email here. :)

***

Oh, the super cute teapot, creamer and tray was at an Antique Mall.

I did not buy it but I love it :) 

***

However, we will see what we find at the VNA rummage sale,

it's this weekend!!! I have been looking forward to this for...well, 

months LOL. 

(if you are new here, the VNA rummage sale is the mother of all 

glorious estate/garage sales and I have found a lot of beautiful dishes,

silver-plate things (silver-ware and teapots, trays...) and I also find stationary

there, beautiful things but so much more affordable!).

***

I am happy to be back home now, thought my mind was filled

of so many Ottawa memories, I was aching a bit that way;

of course I also still miss my Cleo Cat.

found another two 'a year ago' pictures of her:

Cleo Cat: I still miss you!

***

It's strange to have her not here, a bit more normal

I guess however, I will always miss her.

***

I am so glad that God gave Cleo to me for the 13+ years I had her!

***

I ordered take-out to be delivered and am really grateful for that!

I have a lot to be thankful for.

***

I pray where ever you are today and what ever your situation,

you can be comforted by thankfulness to God... 

Briefly...

Today is the first time since May 10th 

that I left the house without crutches.

I took a cab to PT and back again.

PT is good but ouch, atrophied muscles 

hurt when one is using them after weeks of

non-use.

I had to rest after coming back home and

having a late lunch.

Tomorrow I get to be home all day

and I plan on resting, doing my PT and enjoying 

the quiet.

I am thankful for the progress and 

it's so wonderful to be able to stand up

and walk! Even if walking is often a bit painful...

it's still such a joy and a privilege! 

4th & 5th day of Christmas

The above pictures were from day 4.

It was a day of various phone calls and rest...

it's a blessing that we have such nice food to eat

via our grocery delivery service; 

I just love the chicken and mashed potatoes! 

I had a 60% cocao one square sized treat from our

tower of sweets from Mr Husband's parents,

and it was so very enjoyable,

the best chocolate I've had this week I think.

We watched a Walton's episode again and

did prayers together, ... lots of rest and trying to recover.

On to day 5...

Day 5 was another good, quiet day.

I felt good when I awoke, the sun was shining brightly and it was only 8:30 

in the morning (I had been sleeping in till close to 10! the flu will do that!)

I felt so much better, I had hopes of doing a bit more that day.

I was able to do two things extra:

I lit all the livingroom lampadas and I collapsed many boxes that I no

longer had need of. 

I also ended up taking a nap in the afternoon, I was suddenly so tired

and I was actually more congested towards evening again.

We had enjoyable meals, I had I think 6 different types of tea!

(Green, black with chili and mango, African Autumn, Ginger Lemon and Gypsy Cold Care).

It was a real drink-all-the-teas day.

Actually between gifts I have been given, teas I have bought and teas I have

made mixes of, I do have a pretty large collection of teas.

It's fun and I love having so many choices also to offer others!

I also got a new teapot lid holder/drip catcher via amazon; so far so good!

We also watched another episode of the Walton's and I made extra popcorn

so I could have some tomorrow without the fuss of making it again.

We are enjoying the very last of the pate also.

I was able to a potluck spreadsheet for help

for my belated 40th birthday party 

and that is giving me something to look forward to

as we recover.

Mr Husband is seeing the doctor on Friday,

please pray for this.

He has a long way to go yet, longer than myself I fear.

I admit I was getting a bit stir crazy earlier today,

it's been over a week since I got sick,

I am gaining but slowly and I am not well enough really to leave the house

(esp as it was so cold) and it gets a bit 'cabin fever' but not too bad.

I find that taking pictures of my day and varying things

like what treat I get that day, what teas I want to have, what I am reading,

they bring a difference into the convalescence house-bound time.

My quilting-friend DV is coming Friday to keep me company

and help me with somethings 

while Mr Husband has his appointment.

So I am looking forward to this as well.

I am finding that if I focus my mind on thanksgiving for the 

many, many blessings I have, 

then I see how good it is right now

and what a blessing it is to be with my Husband

and how wonderful a piece of chocolate or a cup of tea is.

Well, time to rest again now.

I am thankful for day 4 and 5 of the 12 days of Christmas!

So Many Good Things

I love how pictures can show us all the beauty and goodness that is in 

our current daily lives.

I had some fun going through various cookbooks for ideas

on things to bake in the future and for brunch ideas.

I am planning a brunch and also thinking of fun things to have when DV

I have family over this summer.

We had gotten a Christmas gift of various meats and we had 2 of the

hamburgers on Friday on toasted English Muffins with white cheddar cheese +

Dutch Gouda cheese.  They were so tasty!

We enjoyed watching a few of the Walton's shows during Bright Week, having

Kulich and cheese Pascha.  

I read a lot of CS Lewis In the Time of War and am enjoying it.

I need to remember to read more of my CS Lewis collection, including various of his 

letters, which we have in print at home in our home library.

I have still not fully recovered from the cough/congestion but I was given 

the strength (and voice!) to teach Sunday School this past Sunday,

which was a real delight.

We were at our favourite diner twice recently and enjoyed various 

none-fasting foods! 

Sometimes I get a bit disappointed in not feeling my best 

(this Lent has set me back in terms of illness) but I am really trying to see

how many things I am able to do and that while I may not feel the best

some days, or parts of the day, I have been given the strength to do what 

I have most hoped to do - and to be patient as I seek to regain 

health and strength.

I appreciated this blog post of a Mother who burned out by 

trying to have a fully organic/homemade life and the isolation that she 

experienced.  It was a good reminder, esp. in the understanding that our 

identity, who we ARE, is not from what we are able to DO or have,

or the ideals we have.  Yes, I buy mainly organic food for our home,

but we eat out too.  I am still learning the 'art of balance' in terms of things

and being grateful in all things. 

It's often when I look back at the pictures I took, that I see

how wonderful things are over all and the beauty that is in my life.

Perspective, Choices and What a picture from 1904 taught me

I have been thinking a lot on how to best be

where I am now, on the small and large scale,

as in my personal life and the larger world that I live in.

*

We all know that there are troubling things daily

in our world.

*

Here is what I am learning on how to 

not have the worries destroy

our peace and our daily lives.

*

I know I will be on this journey the rest of my life,

and that it is by no means a final understanding on 

this but that too is part of what I am learning.

*

We are all living as along as God gives us.

What we have now is the present moment.

The past is gone, the future we do not know.

*

I have struggled with anxiety on various levels

and it is one of my weaknesses.

*

Lately I am learning to do little prayers when I feel overwhelmed,

such as this one from the Psalms:

when I am afraid, I trust in Thee.

and repeat this verse many times

inwardly.

*

Doing small prayers,

crossing myself, saying the Jesus Prayer,

these are all helps.

*

I am learning to tune out a lot of news and worry.

I am learning that you can choose to have a peaceful day

or an anxious day.

It's all where and what you focus on and put your energy towards.

I am learning that if I start worrying and keep dwelling on the worry,

I am putting all of my energy there and it will build.

*

I have this picture in our library/chapel/guestroom that

a dear friend gave us:

It is of Tsar Nicholas, his family and St. Elizabeth as well,,

on Pascha night 1904.

It's so beautiful. 

Above this picture is a handpainted icon of

St. Tsar Nicholas, who is one of the Royal Martyrs

whose feast day is this week.

I learned something looking at this picture recently:

In 1904 they were all celebrating Pascha in their

most beautiful and stately clothes.

They did not know the future,

that soon a war (with Japan) would be going on,

or that they would be martyred in less than 20 years.

*

We don't know what our future is.

But we can choose to have Pascha today.

We can choose to live in the present, whatever that is.

*

We can focus on what we don't have or,

if one has kids, what is bugging oneself about that

current situation in life, 

and of course there are many struggles and challenges

but I am learning that I can choose to be happy or unhappy.

*

For instance, for me I am still working on building community 

and a life.  I am also learning a lot about letting go

and sometimes it is very tiring.

Yet! : I can focus on 

what I still feel I lost leaving Ottawa

or I can look at all I have gained and how

much better it is for me now and how I KNOW that

moving to New Jersey was the BEST thing I could of done

for my new life with Mr. Husband

and apprecaite the new life I have.

*

I can read scary stuff online, thereby paralyzing myself with

fear and being unable to pray, provide a peaceful haven or function...

or I can go read a happy book, work on being at peace

and pray to God....  

*

It's not that I am staying ignormant of troubling things.

But it is that I am deciding that today

I can just appreciate the day I have.

That Cleo is next to me as a type, that I have more

provisions than my daily bread, that I can pray to God

for help for myself and the world.

That I can choose to take care of myself, my home

and my husband and seek to create beauty

and a peaceful place for us to live

in a world that is troubled.

*

And there are things we can do to try

to best survive when we are in a 

difficult place in life.

I really appreciated these words by Joy

about how she is learning to replenish herself

admist many trials in her current life. 

*

Ultimately, 

I am learning that I can choose what this day will be.

I can have self-pity, discontentment or anxiety

or I can practice thankfulness, prayer and striving to be at peace....

I can be with God today and with Him and by His mercy,

I can have peace.