Sunday, November 09, 2008

These days are full of boxes

A friend came over and helped me pack my good dishes. Not that they are all packed yet, but three boxes of them are!

I have been feeling overwhelmed about work and very inexperienced in how to deal with the situations I see ahead of me. It is strange to be nearly 32 and feel a LOT younger than 32. Here I had thought, years ago, that adults knew what to do and had things pretty much under control. Now that I live in the adult world, I am finding this not to be the case.

I am also struggling to see accurately what is actually going on in my current life. At times the waves (so to speak) in my life seem big and terrible. I have a feeling that they are not really that fully daunting, but the newness of them, coupled with the chaos and disorganization in my home, is blurring my vision.

I read a Psalm last night about God trying us with fire and later bringing us to a place of refreshment. I am hoping to gain the inward strength and stability to be able to better ascertain what is actually going on and face the fears and know what to do to solve the underlying causes of these fear-laced waves.

Lord have mercy and save us!

8 comments:

RW said...

Hey Elizabeth
take heart and realize that we are all struggling in different ways - and that is just the way it is going to be.

I am mystifed by your comment - do you go to an old calendar church?

elizabeth said...

Hi RW,

yeah. Sometimes I get tired of life being a struggle though. I have actually been thinking about you this week - if I was at St. Hermans I would be picking your brain as you also work in a more corporate setting and may have some advice!

Yes, I do go to an old calendar church; I heard about the priest from Shannon P. and others and when I came to Ottawa I went and realized within a few weeks that I had found my spiritual father. So I stayed. It is an old calendar church that is not old calendarist - over half the church is Eastern European - lots of people from Russian, Ukraine, Bulgaria - (though Bulgaria, along with Romania, Greece, etc are new calendar) - i like it for the practicality around Christmas time, funny enough. I usually start the fast on the New Calendar so I can end it on Christmas with my family who are prodestants. Not to mention my Godmother in MI at a new calendar Antiochian church. As I have yet to have Dec 25 Christmas in Ottawa, since my family is all elsewhere, it is nice also to be on old calendar because I can spend Christmas with them when I come back! I end up ending the fast and then kind of resuming it for a weekend or so and then having Christmas again. Some how it all works out this way.

Of course I am actually between the two calendars all the time, since I often go to the OCA Cathedral for Wednesday night vespers... I often read saints stories for both calendars if I have the time/energy in the morning! There must be some sort of irony in all this...

Kassianni said...

ha! the adult thing. I know what you mean. 36, and I'm still not sure.

elizabeth said...

yeah it is tricky for sure!

Mimi said...

Lord have Mercy indeed.

elizabeth said...

yes.

thanks Mimi!

RW said...

thanks for taking the time explain - however and whenever you begin the Nativity Fast may it be blessed.

email me anytime if you want to talk corporate mumbo - jumbo!

elizabeth said...

hi RW - i may take you up on your offer to email... :) i know very few Christian woman in the corporate world... :)

and your welcome for the explanation and thank you for your well wishes for it!

i am wishing you also a wonderful Nativity Fast Advent Season!