I have been thinking about what I read, listen to and watch.
More and more I see that what I want to write,
what I want to offer the world,
is beauty, words of encouragement, both of which are
ultimately only of worth if they point to Christ,
to the Church and to the hope we have...
I find that I am more and more aware,
in these last years, that everything I look at,
I am searching and I am especially searching for help.
I am constantly looking for icons, for spiritual help, for that peace
that I lose so easily, for that guidance that I have a hard time hearing.
Beyond this, or rather, in this, I am looking for that reason.
That age old question, why am I alive?
What is my specific purpose?
And I am finding that I want to offer words that are
beautiful, pictures that speak of warmth, of sharing life, of
substance, of that something more.
We are all looking for it.
I hear people saying and even commercials saying:
it changed my life.
I don't think most people know what change they are even looking for.
I guess that is one thing that I understand a bit more,
though putting it into practice is another question.
The change that everyone really needs is to have more of Christ in them
and to be united with Christ.
As an Orthodox Christian I do not hesitate to say that two of the most
integeral ways of this is through the sacraments that are like twins,
one before the other: Holy Confession and Holy Communion.
After this, and in this, is prayer.
****
I wanted to write this down as I hope to get back to my writing again,
and reading. I wanted to remember why I want to write,
what I want to offer and what I see as the deepest
points of the change that all of us want
but most of us don't even know
that it is offered to us,
or even that it really
exisits
and many of us don't know if we want it,
if we are willing to change our lives so that
our lives can be changed.
****
May the mercy of God be with us and
save us!!!
