Today was a really special day. A baptismal liturgy, it was so beautiful done that way. I would do it that way all the time! So special! here's a few of my pictures!
So: I am on about 12 hours sleep (total) in 4 days now. It's just 11 PM; I tried to sleep once already but it did not work.
I understand a lot of the reasons why this is happening (Complex-PTSD and life) but it's also very hard. I am trying to do what I can to support myself through this. Including no sugar, no caffiene tea, green smoothies, lots of protein. When you are hit with insomnia at this level, I can now say with better understanding, that you are becoming very physically depleted and are very vunerable to getting physically sick.
I am trying not to do this because if I get sick (like a sinus infection; I had terrible sinus pain two nights after I flew home because flying can cause problems with my ears and I forgot and listened to music on my headphones which made it worse)... if I were to fall ill to a cold or something like this, if it became a sinus infection, I am in a tough spot because i am allergic to antibiotics.
I can tell you something else though: when you are suffering like this, God gives you a lot of mercy and grace to help you in the suffering. We just have to keep going to Christ for help and mercy...
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