Okay, now that I've discussed a lot of what troubled me and struck chords with me in difficult ways. I want to talk about this book again because I want to be as balanced as I can. So I want to tell you things I really liked about it and what I see that is beautiful. Because this book is worth reading and wrestling with, which is what I'm doing.
First, the author is very brave. She has faced a lot of her own pain, understood it, gotten through it and sees the Lord in it. She's very brave because she writes about it. She isn't hiding like she used to as a child. So that in itself is a really huge thing. I hope to have the same courage one day.
Next, I really loved the story about her mother and how she saw her mother's faith. Even though they couldn't find a church that fit them. She writes about her mother having her full eyes on Christ when she sees him on the TV like in a Ben Hur movie. Now some people may be quick to dismiss that; it's way too easy to dismiss each other I find. But I found her understanding of her mother's faith and love for Christ, incredibly beautiful. And that she linked it to one of my favorite gospel stories and Saints. The story of the woman who gives Christ his anointing for burial with the very expensive perfume is profound.
I've already mentioned this, but I really liked all of her actual stories. I liked learning about her mother's country. I didn't know a lot about it. I don't actually know a lot of history and many people don't. But if you're all curious and like to learn more, this is a great little book.
Towards the beginning of the book there was some things I couldn't engage with as easily because she's coming from a Protestant perspective that I left 21 years ago. But later in the book when she ties in her understanding of Scripture with her and her mother's story, I really enjoyed it. It brought a new perspective and I thought there was real love and wisdom there.
I think one of the biggest things is this shows a really big question for me. She honestly felt that people didn't see her if they said she looked the same as others. This was when she would be talking about her experience as different. As someone from her mother's culture.
I'm purposely not mentioning what culture because I think the concepts are broader than just her culture. It can be linked to any culture where you're an immigrant in another country. Or you're a child of an immigrant. I'm that. My mother was born in Holland and is the youngest of eight and immigrated with her family when she was 1 years old to Canada. So I too am a child of an immigrant mother. Though I have a very different story than this author.
I think lastly, I really loved her ending. The story she wrote was really beautiful and tied in the strands of her books well.
I did feel that maybe the book could have been even more than it was. That she could have been pushed even more about my questions at least. But that said, it's still a lovely little book. It's given me a lot to think about.
Questions like what do you do when someone feels excluded but by so happening, because you understand yourself, you also feel excluded by the other. So you have two people feeling excluded by each other but who are also Christians and therefore Christian sisters to each other. So how do you bridge that gap?
For me, it would not be telling the other person that they should feel or think differently than they do. It may just be accepting that there's real difference. And that by so accepting difference, perhaps you can still build a bridge.
A bigger question for anyone who's a Christian I think is how do you bridge gaps with those who are not Christian? What does it mean to love people who don't understand you. Who don't believe that God is love. Who experienced the church in a way or their concept of a church in a way that to them excludes them.
There's a lot for food to think about here.
And what about truth?
I love a phrase but rewrote it.... It's a bit cynical (I will talk about the phrase in a little bit) but our culture is very much into accepting everyone as the same. That is ironic for me to say since my brain automatically sees everything in a way as the same.
But what I mean here is that there's no adherence to a higher truth in a lot of our culture today. People are much more ready to say: Oh, that's what you believe? That's great for you. And they'll be supportive as long as it's not a belief that they think is cruel. For as much as people say, I will support whatever you or anyone believes, they won't do that. If they think that person is harmful to themselves or others. That's not how that sort of belief works.
So my cynical take is very simple. A lot of people want to say "whatever floats your boat". But I say "what floats your boat may sink mine" (as in my boat). Buy this I mean that not all ideas can exist at the same time or all be true.
For instance, I really enjoy reading an author who I'm studying for my writing project and I do my best to love him and really listen. But I still disagree with him. Why? Because I believe that a person has a soul. And this person doesn't.
Can we both coexist in the same world? Can we be kind to each other? I think so. But it doesn't mean that one is going to sacrifice their view of truth for the other. I wouldn't sacrifice mine. And this author is very convinced by his own ideas.
I want to talk about her experience at what I think now must have been the Coptic Orthodox in another blog post. But I wanted to put this one up because I really believe in kindness and balance. If you disagree with an author you should still be able to see everything you do like and be able to talk about both.
May God have mercy on us.
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