I had this conversation with a colleague the other day. I had noticed her as someone who is very much herself and comfortable with this. She talked all about the importance of being oneself and that it is a waste of time and effort to being anything but yourself.
Very simple, and I think that we have all heard it before. But you know I found myself really thinking about it afterwards. Even wrote down the details of the conversation in my paper journal… I am also growing in my awareness that I am not always that self-aware and, moreover, do not know how I appear to others.
This colleague said I am quite different – unique – she was about to try to describe me, but stopped!!! I actually was disappointed; I hope I was disappointed not due to vanity but because I have no idea of how I am in the world. Like I live with myself ALL THE TIME (it does get annoying at times, let me tell you) so I am not that aware of how I appear to others. Okay so I know I do something eccentrically, like eat my lunches with a real plate and cutlery, but I heard that plastic can seep through and infect food, and who wants that?! Besides, I like to feel civilized a little bit; I also take a suitcase with me a lot!!! So it’s a bit easier than bearing it all on my back. What can I say, other than that I inwardly cheer when I see another woman walking to work dragging a small suitcase too : )
The only other thing can think of right now is that I don’t listen to much music, other than ancient faith radio and at home the news in French (I am trying to learn it, sigh.) well and I do not have a TV and have not seen a movie in a theatre since well, since the Twin Towers came out – so a few years. And I don’t drink anything caffeinated, and have never had coffee. Basically perhaps I don’t quite live in the era I am living in, perhaps. But WHY do something like that!!
On other news – read prince Caspian again last night and started on the horse and his boy. I had to tear myself away from it this morning. And all to walk to work in the midst of what was 40 Km gusts of wind and ice pellets. My friend at work said I would be like a feather in the wind! (I am not the thin-ish side). She said it in French though, so I need to learn this expression too…