Yesterday NYC; Today Baking Cookies

Yesterday I went to NYC.

I had lunch with Mr Husband and then

went to Columbus Circle Christmas Market and saw

one of the White Sisters of St Elizabeth Convent 

and bought some special things for gifts.

***

Today I was home and so glad to be home.

I managed to order some special Delft things for our home,

texted some dear friends, including my sister-friend,

and made 2 double batches of vegan cranberry chocolate chip cookies.

I read Tolkien at night to Mr Husband.

We are in 1938 and loving it.

***

My Mom was given a lot of +Aunt Karen's things to go through and 

she picked some things out for me...

it's really hitting home for me, how my Aunt will not be at Christmas this year.

How I can hear her voice still, remember how she looked, moved, her laugh,

but I can't see her again alive, talk to her in person.

I miss her.  I will be glad to have a few treasured things to keep her memory close

but oh, how such things never come close to the actual person.

It's such a mystery, death; how one moment they are here, the next, gone.

How is it? 

***

My Husband and I had been struggling with the unbloggable that only seems

to be worse but we had a really good talk about it and are happier after our talk,

even though the situation remains unchanged.

***

My Grandma has knee replacement surgery Dec 18th.

She is in her upper 80s now in age.

I am a bit worried about her surgery

and am trying to pray about it more.

When I think of her and how just this week she told me again

how she talks to the Lord, really talks to Him about her concerns,

for others and their needs,

and how she said of one person she knows who is really struggling,

that she wants to pray for that person more than once a day

and really remember them, to pray for them.

***

I feel perhaps the one thing that gives me hope,

that Fr Schmemann wrote of in his journals:

'the only thing one should feel sad about is not being a Saint'

(to paraphrase slightly).

I look at myself and my life and see only poverty now, about myself.

***

But my Grandma, how special she is.

Her advice to me those years ago about when I asked

what to do if I lose my Husband,

so beautiful, profound.

I see now that it has implications for what to do 

in all loss, even, God forbid, one day losing her.

***

My Grandma has already baked the Christmas bars and breads she makes,

she can't lift as much now she she has switched to plastic bowls when 

using a hand mixer. She just adapts and most people don't even

know that she has done so.

***

I am thinking of her a lot lately.

Using the silver-plate silverware she gave me,

her dishes.

***

I told her this week how I found bowls to go with the set

that she had given me, that she used for decades.

She was real pleased and surprised.

Tickled I think the word would be. 

I am wanting those dishes even more,

but I think because I am thinking of my Grandma so much.

***

When I am thinking of my Grandma's faith, 

and of such things, these verses have been coming to mind,

in a prayer that I desire, surfacing as it were,

a glimpse of what I really want....:

"10 Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

11 Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me.

12 Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit."

Psalm 51: 10-12 KJV

Thank you for your prayers

Thank God my Grandma's surgery went well.

She ended up having a new pacemaker put in

and the surgery went well and she was home 

earlier than expected.

My Dad's Oldest Brother, my Uncle L and his wife my Aunt K

were with my Grandma that day and both

my Mom and I (and I am sure others!) talked to my 

Grandma last night by phone.

She has to have her arm up in a sling and is heavily bandaged for 24 hours

but she is home and doing well.

Tonight my parents are going to go over for dinner with her.

***Thank you so much for your prayers!***

Prayer Request for my Grandma

My Grandma Ruth is having 

surgery for her pacemaker

that has a wire that is either loose or 

malfunctioning.

She has surgery tomorrow.

Asking your prayers.

My Grandmother

 

I am thinking a lot of my Grandmother.
We've had such great talks.
I miss her already.
Over the last year whenever I am home
I try to take a day with her
and we go over old photographs
and I write down who they are
and she tells me stories of her past.
*
She is such a pure soul.
I marvel at her life and her heritage
that I have inherited.
One of her Grandfathers
was a real man of the Bible.
He read the Bible very often,
was what my Grandma called
a great scholar of the Bible,
was consulted by Elders in his church
(Protestants have elders and deacons, very
different than in Orthodoxy)
for advice 
and he taught Bible class for 40 years.
He was gentle, kind, never a harsh word spoken.
He would play with his Grandkids
and the stories of his love of the Bible
inspired me when I was a child
and my Grandma would tell me about her
Grandfather.
*
My Grandma's Father was also a
real man of the Bible
and loved God very much.
My Grandma's parents were on the school board
for the first Christian school in Grand Rapids
and my Grandma's two sisters
went to Calvin College
and all of them through Christian education through
high school.
*
My Grandma knew she was called to marry
my Grandfather and so she did
after one semester at Calvin.
She knew who she was and what was her calling.
It was different in those days
and she made a home for her husband,
my Grandpa and their children.
My Grandma and Grandpa served the church
all their lives and my Grandma
still teaches Bible study at her church,
which I think she has done for 40 years or so.
She has done evangelistic things for decades
and is always looking for ways she can serve God.
*
My Grandfather had many struggles
especially with his health in later years
and I never saw him get bitter by it.
*
My Grandma is adjusting to a quieter life
since she fell back in January.
She may never regain the strength and stamina
she had before.
We grow old, all of us.
I read recently in a book by Elder Paisos about needing
to grow so that when we are old,
we are a strong tree providing shade
 for those who are younger.
My Grandma prayers for all of us daily
and I pray she keeps her strength to see me married
(even though she most likely cannot come to my wedding
itself) and to do the reception in MI at Christmas time
at her community hall.
*
I can't tell you how much I miss my Grandma and
wish for more time with her.
Her sister my Great Aunt is struggling as is one of my Uncles.
I put them all on the monastery prayer lists.
I am comforted to know that so many pray for her.
*
One thing that continues to strike me is how
thankful to God she is for her life
and for being put in a godly Christian home
with such loving parents and
then a good husband and now
children who love and help her
in her old age.
It is people like her who
keep families together and
quietly serve God where they are placed
and live a life of service and thankfulness to God.
*
I could not be more blessed by such a Grandmother.

Prayers Requested...

Latest Facebook update from Noah's Mom Kate:

VERY bad labs today. Liver numbers are 50 times higher than they should be (they are measuring the enzymes put off by the death of liver tissue) and rocketing up fast. They were 1,100 a week ago and are 1,800 as of today. BUN is up only slightly (bad kidney number) but Noah always has a lower than normal BUN so having it elevated is significant. Bili is up a bit and there are lots of other labs that are off.

Worse of all, the MRSA is still growing out in his urine after almost 2 weeks of antibiotics, AND he is growing out another bacteria as well now. Yes, he GOT a new bladder infection while on antibiotics. Both bugs are obviously resistant to the Zyvox he is on.

The swelling continues to worsen. He doesn't look like the same child. He is still as sweet as ever, though, and he just doesn't complain. He did get teary and choked up yesterday and quietly told me that Mary Faith gets to go to birthday parties and to friends houses and he can't go to them anymore. I loved on him and told reminded him that he's been to lots of birthday parties, but he wasn't buying it - he was sad that he can't go anymore. He also pointed out that he can't play hide and seek anymore because it is too hard to walk.

I don't know how much more my heart can handle.

Please also remember my Grandma who is still recovering from her fall.
She is getting better but is still very tired and has some pain.

Prayer Request - My Other Grandma

Just got this from one of my Aunts:

In case any of you haven't heard ... Grandma fell last night and broke her pubic bone. She went to the hospital this morning and had lots of X-rays and they determined that was the cause of much pain in her leg.

They can't do anything surgically - she just needs to stay off it as much as possible. She will be staying with me until she is better. She is very comfortable while sitting or lying down but not while on her feet.

*
Please pray for her.

Of course I find this upsetting.

But am also glad that it was not a worse accident.

My Grandma's name is Ruth.