Last Fast-Free Friday until after Christmas!

 

It's currently just after 10 AM EST.  We had biscuits (and I had one rusk) with strawberries and butter for breakfast! and Tea of course! This week has had a lot of ups and downs for me.  I think it's partly I have not been out swimming (my ears are plugged still, last week was the dread summer cold and I had a lot of insomnia + two weekday liturgies).  

A priest I knew in Ottawa died on Wednesday :(  He was only 51.  Heart attack.  He would visit our parish and we would go to his at times for weekday services.  I remember when he first came, he was very quiet and shy.  Later, it was like he was totally transformed.  He took some classes from my priest that I think put such light in his soul, it was a beautiful transformation, one I will never forget.  He was no longer shy and he had such joy.  He told me (and others I think) once that when he was at seminary he was not really aware of God and the sacraments and what they do. It was like he was a little insensible to the reality of things. But then, slowly, he came alive. He began realizing the truth of it while still at seminary.  And he kept realizing this and became such a kind, joyful priest. He became alive, transformed. I remember his joy most of all, and that story.  That humble story of at first looking at being a priest as a job he would do only to a change in seeing the church and being a priest as a beautiful life-giving, life-changing event and situation.  May the Lord remember him in His kingdom! And may God help us reach the joy that is so clearly in this priest's life and ministry!  (He was also a teacher and I read a touching tribute about how his students loved him even in the pandemic they would want to come to zoom class with him! He is going to be missed by so many, his wife, two kids, church family, and students...and friends....) May his memory be eternal! 

I remember his beautiful bright church and Mr Husband and I's wedding reception was at his church's church hall.  It's hard to really understand that he is no longer with us.

While I moved from Ottawa nearly 9 years ago, I feel in ways more close to Ottawa than I ever was. I think the online youtube channel helps, I often play parts of services while I am cleaning at home and hear so many familiar voices.   In a lot of ways if I think about it I am still in Ottawa, as in my heart is still there.  I miss it very much while I don't think God has in His plan for my return to Canada.  This is hard but at least at present, it seems to be impossible on so many levels. 

But I have SO MUCH to be thankful for and I see that.  

Well, it is now evening, nearly 10:30.  I ended up talking to my Mom today and told her I was struggling with my writing project, wondering if it was any good and that I was feeling a bit down.  I've never tried such a big thing before and told her I wished I could have advice (meaning from someone experienced in this sort of thing) and she told me: you need to take a break because I was asking for advice.  And I listened of course, esp as some of you kindly said something similar.  My Mom told me to do something different.  I asked her why as I honestly need to learn to understand this.  I feel like at 44 I am in some sort of kindergarten, where I have to learn A=B&C in terms of what to do when X happens.   She explained it was because I was feeling discouraged/unsure/down that it meant I needed a break, a rest, do something different.  Come back to it later, refreshed, in other words.  I know such things should be obvious but in our world, well, I often miss such 'memos' and to be honest many, perhaps esp women, missing the memo to rest.  So I am reading a book I bought a couple years ago, Especially Father by Gladys Taber. I am still in the first third or so of it and boy is it a fun and funny book. She sure can tell a story and tell it well!   I felt so relaxed just reading about the earlier time and the nice summers they had (though with such a Father it would be difficult!)  It's been really nice to read!

I also talked with L. today, the older woman from our local church who just months before the pandemic happened, broke her hip... she's back home now but never regained what she lost... it was really good to talk with her.... later I was talking to my Grandma when my Husband called, he had gone swimming and told me that it was not crowded (usually in afternoon it is) and was warm and he did not bring his keys so if I want, I could join him.... well my Grandma clearly wanted me to go swimming so I did, it was nice to do again, though I like early morning adult swim better, just less stressful and noisy! ... 

It was fun to have ice cream twice in one day and lots of strawberries! When one normally fasts every Wednesday and Friday, it's extra special when one does not because of a big feast (this one of course being Pentecost).  

I am researching Plum recipes.  Vegan ones or one I can make vegan.  

Well, it's late now.  I hope you had something nice in your day today.  I felt like I turned a corner today.  

God bless and keep you all!