So it is the end of the fiscal year at work next week; my boss walks quickly past my office door and back again (oddly enough I have an office, rare for my level of librarianship actually). Our monthly meeting was postponed a week; our acquisitions people have been pulling their hair out. Yet do I realize why I have been feeling so STIR CRAZY for all of February and March, to various degrees of intensity?
Nope. It takes talking with the Head of Reference, who has a lot more experience and insight than I, to say the pressure around here has been intense to a ridiculous degree. Then I realized, and she affirmed, that I was absorbing the atmosphere into myself, and it was making me feel like a mouse in a wheel, running everywhere and getting no where (and thus running all the more frantically).
Now I understand. What to do about it I am not sure, but I am feeling a bit better just realizing. I am always disappointed that I miss obvious things like this. Oh well. good thing God loves me anyway.
Here I thought it was just living in a city (just read E post on missing living in the country).
God have mercy on us all!
4 comments:
I completely understand feeling a certain way but having no idea why I'm feeling that way. It can even be something huge, like a major event in my life just the previous week, but I *still* can't see it! We are such forgetful creatures.
As you say, God loves us anyway. Perhaps God loves us not in spite of, but because of, our forgetful and wonderful endearing qualities.
thanks muchly tamie... yes; sometimes i am so close to something, that i cannot see it at all; thanks for understanding and relating! :)
Hey, Little Rose.
Here is the link to E's post (the one you cited):
http://voxclamanti.blogspot.com/
2007/03/longing-for-home.html
Have a blessed Pascha!
- V.
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