Today was a gift to me of refreshment in the midst of it all

Today was a real gift to me.

I was able to be home in solitude all day.

I had quiet, other times beautiful music, including this:

I realized yesterday, with some surprise and sadness, that I had read 

almost all of Miss Read Thrush Green books. 

I have been so blessed by these quiet peaceful books.

Often when things have been difficult, 

I would go visit Thrush Green, book by book, and peace would return.

I realized, also with some surprise, that I had forgotten what it was like

to have something to look forward to the next day.

What a sad state of affairs I have been in for quite a while, that way.

Not that I never had things to look forward to, 

but that sense of delight, solitude and inward happiness that can never

be grabbed at but only given, usually unexpectedly.

Anyway, visiting Thrush Green gave me this, esp. at times and it was such 

a solace for me. 

So this morning I relished in a quiet morning,

it was raining and grey,

I had delicious tea, and I read and later enjoyed a small bit of chocolate

before a simple lunch.

One cannot create these moments, they are simply given as a gift. 

Of course, one can do things to open oneself up to them,

for me reading Miss Read, my morning habit of a pot of tea, using 

my beautiful china, it all lead me towards this refreshment.

I also got a lot done that afternoon, folding clean laundry, washing many loads,

dishes, dishwasher, moving books to my office nook 

(isn't it lovely? I don't use it often at present but it is a closet in our office

so that my Husband has most of the office for himself as I have so much 

in the rest of the house that is more 'mine' as it were). 

and I even decluttered my sewing table in the livingroom.

I have not had a chance to sew much in a long time, I keep hoping but

often what I find I need first is reading, 

it helps me with the unbloggable and having a bit of refreshment

and peace that I can then have to bless my Husband with also,

is paramount in the midst of our personal challenges.

And it is not that today did not have struggle,

oh no, my friend's and their very difficult news was very much with me

and it took work for me to gain the peace and sense of cozy rest that I 

needed after being plunged into such ice-cold hard news and an afternoon in NYC yesterday.

And next week I most probably will be in NYC 3 different days so today

was even more important that today I had some quiet.

I've not had much solitude in the last bit and it was very restorative...

candles at night for dinner and a hot bath was helpful also.

Something I have learned and am learning that sometimes the best thing I can 

do when other people's worlds are tumbling down, 

is to maintain peace and create it in my home, in myself,

it took me a long time to realize that it is not wrong to 

be happy (i.e. have refreshment, quiet and restoration if one can get it) when 

another person is in such grief. 

I am seeing now that the only way I can give

to another is if I have something to give and if I let myself

be worn out without doing anything to get rest,

I will have nothing to give, nothing to offer.

And so today, 

I am grateful for the gift of it,

of the gift of beauty, quiet and restoration that I experienced

in the midst of it all.