Springtime

Well.

After further thought about matters,

though I had told Margaret that Cleo would begin blogging,

I have realized that Cleo blogging would not fit this blog.

So allow me to just say a few kind words about her.

I am so grateful that I have Cleo to take care of.

One of my dear friends sent me an email with words from

Matushka Juliana Schmemann's new book "The Joy to Serve"

which talks about Motherhood and spiritual Motherhood.

I know it is, as Mat. J. Schmemann writes, true that I too

have a desire to be a Mother...

Now, no worries, I know I am not a spiritual Mother to my cat.

Cleo does not have a soul like a human.

But I am still responsible for her.

And it is such a joy.

Even when she wakes me in the middle of the night (and believe me she does weekly)

or throws up cat-hair balls because I have not brushed her enough (oops)

or decides that midnight is a great time to play

catch me if you can,

while she races around my small apartment with her quick four feet,

I am so glad I have her.

Children of my own I do not know if I will ever have.

This is hard but I seek to trust God in this.

But I love having Cleo as my responsibility and she is a delight to me everyday.

She is the cuddly type and purrs loudly when held.

She is at my feet whenever dairy is around

and she also believes she loves chicken and peanut butter.

The latter two she never gets.

And if I open a can of tuna, well, I can only ask her forgiveness for not giving her some!

No mercury poison for her!

But I find that I can write about her but not for her.

But trust me, she is a princess, knows it and is also the best cat friend

I could of ever asked for.

She knows my routine better than I and

often tells me when to get off the computer

or when to go to bed by either meowing

or standing by the bedroom door.

She often sits quietly while I seek to pray

and I believe she is a gift from God to me.

I will posts some other pictures of her sometime

and thank Margret for including Cleo in the animals that she loves!

My final exam for Beginner II is tomorrow!

Then not one but

two weeks

off before my next class.

Wow. Even though I technically had many weeks off while being unemployed

and wondering what to do

these two weeks seem like the first two weeks off in a long time!

Lots to do...

taxes (praying for a good tax refund!)

cleaning (my living room floor has Cleo-hair dust bunnies!)

practicing French

and many other good things.

Spring always feels like a time for new beginnings.

I am really excited about my

declared war on anxiety and ask God's protection while I work on this!

To realize again that with God I can scale even this wall

is really quite wonderful.

I am getting a novel about St. Spyridon in the mail,

hopefully this week,

along with an Akathist to him.

I listened to another lovely podcast of Frederica Mathewes-Green

in which she talks about how men especially love Orthodoxy

because it gives them something to do and to go towards

and that women get this too, but men sometimes first.

Well while I can not fully relate to this,

as for me Orthodoxy was something I dove into fairly quickly,

but the reason I can relate to!

I think this is why I am excited about seeking to overcome

anxiety because it is something with God that I can do.

***

Are you excited about anything right now?

Or has it been a while for you for this sense of excitement about the future?

I know that for me I do not always feel this way

and am astounded that I do right now.

***

Life is really hard.

I have heard of an old classmate of mine coming down with cancer

for the third time.

He is a husband, a father of 3 or 4 kids

and is not doing well.

God had healed him twice.

This is really devastating.

And the stories go on around us again and again.

***

The only real answer to this is Christ's Resurrection.

***

Singing Christ is Risen to those dead in the graves

on cemetery day

or sing Christ is Risen in church during the 40 days of brightness

when hearing of a friend's hospitalization,

is where our hope comes from.

***

Christ is Risen!!