Leave Taking of Pascha in June

After a terrifically muggy hot day yesterday

today is warm but with a constant breeze / wind.

Nice to be home.

But I can also tell that I've been home a little too much.

Ever get that way?

Sigh.

I am writing yet another cover letter.

Almost done with the first edit.

Switched fonts for cover letter and resume.

Trying to keep putting energy into the cover letters,

to communicate professionalism and ready to take on this

new greatest ever position

while still being sober enough in the writing to show

I am a professional.

Hard balance.

Are not these two trees something?
Talk about endurance, adaptability and God's miracles.
Not sure yet how to try to get a part time job

while needing so much time to write cover letters and resumes

for various positions I have found online.

I find that all of this is still fairly overwhelming.

But am trying to just focus on the job application at hand.

No emails or phone calls yet from the ones I've sent out lately.

One of my neighbours on my floor moved out this week.

Gave her apartment to a friend, putting her stuff

in storage, took off work for two months

and living at another friends.

"In transition" she said. I liked her. Wish I knew her name.

We did not know each other well but she suffered the most

last year when the small earthquake happened.

She had lots of things fall off the walls and

started talking then already about moving out.

Many people, when they move,

leave a lot of things behind in the basement.

That's where I got this small two step ladder pictured

above. It smelled like perfume when I first got it;

it reminds me of my Dad since he paints houses

and always has ladders about.

It is always strange to see what used to be in some one's belongings

now given away;

she left dishes, a tea pot, vacuums, and other things.

I took two small mason jars, two IKEA glass containers,

and the ladder.

Since I have lots of tea pots, I did not take that.

*

Today is the leave taking of Pascha.

Somehow it seems that today is a special day,

as if Pascha is strong with us again.

I have purposely had my two Resurrection icons lit

with candles today.

I will move my Pascha icon from my buffet tomorrow

and will have St. Spyridon back;

I think a friend is giving me a copy of the icon

of the Ladder, as we are reading

this book over the summer.

I am constantly surprised by this book.

Pleasantly.

Yes, it is really strong and hardcore

with deep repentance and asking God for mercy,

remembering that we will die and face judgement.

But we need to remember this.

As a friend said to me yesterday

(and she is younger than I am)

that we need all of our lives just to prepare for our death.

Yes.

And so books like the Ladder are so full of life

because it squarely deals with how reality is

how we need to prepare;

but with this is the understand that even mourning,

which I have yet to experience like it is described,

I know it will bring the light and hope we seek.

The icon of Ladder is one that I resisted for years,

afraid of seeing the warfare so clearly pictured.

But this is only my wrong understanding about things,

to fear what is actually true.

Instead I have to begin see what

and who the Ladder is going towards:

Christ:

the Giver of Life, the Light of the World,

the one that Ascends so that the Holy Spirit can come.

The Ladder is the stairway to life itself.

Praying that as we go towards Christ's Ascension we can

have courage to stay on the Ladder.