Beginning of the Apostles Fast

After a very intense last week -

interview, job applications, interview prep

the baptism (so wonderful)

Sunday church (wonderful as well)

today I had to rest.

I have a really big interview Wednesday but

know myself well enough that if I did not

listen to how I was feeling

I would not be able to regain the momentum

I need for Wednesday.

*

Add to that continued insomnia due to medicine,

Cleo getting sick in the night

(she's fine now by all accounts)

and city noises,

I knew that I could not push it today.

*

Also, this morning the old contract

I thought I was doing weeks ago

was mentioned again but at the end of today

I still don't know if I am doing that work or not.

So much instability right now;

I feel really weary.

*

I am struggling with the fact that

I will really only have one day to prepare for this interview.

*

But God is merciful and He will carry me through this

and He knows each detail of my life and is

in charge of ordering it.

If I needed a day to recover and be quiet

then so be it.

Better to be quiet and seek to remember God

admits the anxious struggles

than to charge ahead heedless.

*

All this aside, I have been keeping a candle lit for

others, including MamaJuliana

who was to have surgery today.

*

Let us remember one another in prayer.