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Friday, October 09, 2009

Not Sure

Like the Squirrel? I talked to it while I took this picture.

Made me think of MamaJuliana who recently took a

similar picture.

So I realized this morning that I am not sure about the possible

part time job.

If I take it, it will give me enough money to live on

but not much to pay school loans on.

It will last until March.

Here's my concern:

If I take this job I will learn French part time and have less time to really devote to it.

At the end job the job, I will have more work experience,

a possible foot in a door for work,

and more on my resume.

BUT: my real desire was to learn French so that I would not be stuck in the position of

taking the slender pickings of English-only jobs

instead of having a chance at many more jobs in Ottawa that are bilingual.

And I am worried that I will be stuck in a cycle of catch when catch can

of job -agency jobs, which even many of these are bilingual.

(My sister took this picture, it reminds her of God).

I do not know if God will show me outright what to do,

but if peace internally is part of an indication,

I am not fully at peace about this possibility.

However it is hard to discern what to think.

Am I not at peace because of the unexpectedness of it

or because it is not the right way to go?

I pray that God will give me wisdom

if the job is offered to me.

Thank God that the real answers are already here.

I must look to the Christ-child born to us to die to save us.
Thank you so much for all your prayers for me -
I sure did not know when I was younger that life would be so unclear!
Yet the Lord is good to us and in this and in Him I must rejoice.

7 comments:

  1. I know the right decision will become clear.

    And, I'm with your sister, the sun shining through clouds like that always makes me think of God too.

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  2. thanks Mimi! I appreciate you!

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  3. Difficult decision indeed. Prayers that things will become clearer for you very quickly.........

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  4. I will pray. I don't have any discernment myself, I'm always struggling to hear my angel's voice above all the conflicting rationalities of life. I have done a lot of temp work though and I know it can be a hamster wheel that is hard to get off into something better so you are right to be concerned about a cycle of agency jobs. I guess a lot depends on how long your social security will last and what you have to fall back on when things get really dire *hug*

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  5. You are doing all the right things and the answers will come when you need them. I struggle with similar issues all the time and have learned to listen, to wait, to practice faith. I enjoy your blog as it often reminds me that I am not alone in my struggles, that my life is the rule and not the exception. And I really enjoy your photos, you have a good eye.

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  6. thanks so much Elizabeth, and also for your prayers and understanding M and Nov, thanks. you and your father in law are in my prayers.

    yes, truly we are not alone.

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  7. nice photo. Reminds me that even among all the clouds the true Light shines down.

    St Xenia of Petersburg, intercede for Elizabeth, that she may receive discernment.

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